10 Jul 2008
10:19 pm
to be honest, i've lived a life of easy contentment. i guess Singaporean men are all rather boring, without much ambition in life, besides living a simple life.
i'm jus like most ordinary, simple and boring Singaporean men. i've always wished to study hard, do well in school, make it to uni, get a stable and good job, meet and marry my first love, have beautiful children, and die a happy man. (although dying jus leads me on to another life ahead with JESUS!)
to be honest, i've never really wanted anything more, anything less. i guess anything more would be very very very amazing, but besides that, nah. HAHA.
i've been trying to let go, but really, it's kinda hard. to think God answered me a yes. there's so many many times He told me that you're the one. just a month ago, the reply was yes again. i feel so dumb, cos no matter how many times i promised you i will nvr break yr conviction and wanna wait for you, i guess i'm just unconvincing. i never wanted to pressure you. to me, if the time comes and there's still smth, then the wait is worthwhile. but if not, then it's just too bad. but i guess you rather end it all. which kinda like... SUCKS.
i just want you to lean on me when you need someone. i just wanted to be there for you thru the hard and the wonderful times. but guess i'm not needed or wanted. to think i was even compared to zhixian. DAMNIT. like i was that bad. DAMNNNNNN.
i hope you'll give me a chance to show you how much i care and love you, but i rather you forget me than hate me.
10 Jul 2008
10:19 pm
to be honest, i've lived a life of easy contentment. i guess Singaporean men are all rather boring, without much ambition in life, besides living a simple life.
i'm jus like most ordinary, simple and boring Singaporean men. i've always wished to study hard, do well in school, make it to uni, get a stable and good job, meet and marry my first love, have beautiful children, and die a happy man. (although dying jus leads me on to another life ahead with JESUS!)
to be honest, i've never really wanted anything more, anything less. i guess anything more would be very very very amazing, but besides that, nah. HAHA.
i've been trying to let go, but really, it's kinda hard. to think God answered me a yes. there's so many many times He told me that you're the one. just a month ago, the reply was yes again. i feel so dumb, cos no matter how many times i promised you i will nvr break yr conviction and wanna wait for you, i guess i'm just unconvincing. i never wanted to pressure you. to me, if the time comes and there's still smth, then the wait is worthwhile. but if not, then it's just too bad. but i guess you rather end it all. which kinda like... SUCKS.
i just want you to lean on me when you need someone. i just wanted to be there for you thru the hard and the wonderful times. but guess i'm not needed or wanted. to think i was even compared to zhixian. DAMNIT. like i was that bad. DAMNNNNNN.
i hope you'll give me a chance to show you how much i care and love you, but i rather you forget me than hate me.